Am i wrong for this?

Question

So,  my fiancé stopped smoking nicotine a while ago and I will admit it’s mainly my decision because I just can’t stand the smell and I don’t really wanna have a make out session after he smokes. 
PSA: I love him, of course and it’s not a deal breaker for me.  
He just keeps asking me (out of respect) if he can smoke and it’s so aggravating. Like I understand nicotine is addictive and he was a smoker before we met me.  
Am I wrong to tell him no? And to say that I really just rather him not smoke anymore at all.  For one, I care about his health and the other reason is, the smell and how it affects my breathing when I’m around him doing it. I’d just rather him not smoke.  
So,  obviously he is a grown man and if he really wants to smoke he will,  but would that make me controlling if I were to be upset if that’s what he decides to do?

Answer

We have a couple friend whom the wife never let the husband smoke. While I didn’t care what my husband did. Cause nicotine is addicting forsure. And it’s not my place. Now our friends fought constantly and was kinda unpleasant to be around when they fought over it, because he’s a grown ass man too. We won’t stop and babysit him when she isn’t around so that’s that. It was bad cause it’s like he was babied forsure. And At first I didn’t like my hubs doing it but I grew to not care cause I’d rather him be open and honest vs hiding it. Cause everyone he works with does it as well as he did it for a while. Like It’s addictive habit.. I vaped for a while after and learnt really quickly it’s hard as hell to quit. You can’t control him to make better choices but maybe compromise if it’s not a deal breaker for you, like have him brush his teeth after before he kissed you, or do it less around you. But I wouldn’t say be that controlling cause it is toxic and not fun to be around. If he wants to quit support him and find the support to help him. You can express your concerns of why you want him to quit, but the main concern should be his health of course. And maybe help him to want to quit. Rather then act like it’s a deal breaker if it’s not.

Answer

My hubby switched to ZYN nicotine pouches. It’s still bad for you but it doesn’t stink!😅

Answer

It could quite literally kill you to live with a smoker so it should be a deal breaker for you. It will affect your health and longevity. If he doesn't respect that well...

Answer

I think something like smoking and not wanting your partner to do it especially if you're planning a wedding and you're going to be spending your life with this person is not controlling at all. It's personally a deal-breaker for me and I would not agree to marry someone and I wouldn't even live with someone who smoked. I think that he is not understanding that you don't want him to do it at all if he is continuously asking if it's okay if he smokes. Sounds like you need to have a talk with him and let him know that you mean you do not want him to smoke at all anymore and to be completely done with it or he's just going to keep asking you. 
Second hand and third hand smoke is actually really dangerous to you and any future children you all might have and you're right, nobody but a smoker really wants to make out with someone who has just smoked a cigarette so you're not wrong or controlling it all to not want him smoking. When he smokes and you kiss him or touch him you're getting those chemicals all over you and in your mouth...not to mention smoking a cigarette leaves a person smelling awful and I definitely wouldn't want to be sitting next to someone who's just smoked a cigarette let alone cuddling and kissing them. Definitely sounds like you need to have more of a conversation with him about it to let him know that you really mean you don't want him smoking at all because it's kind of confusing that he's still asking after you've told him you don't like it. Let him know how you don't want to smell it or taste it and that's why you don't want him doing it ALSO bring up his health. If you're planning on marrying someone then you would like for them to take care of themselves and be in the best house they can be and smoking is not healthy. A lot of health insurance companies actually make you pay more on your premium if you are a smoker so that's another thing you would have to deal with if you get married and share health insurance.

Answer

Vaping is way worse than smoking cigarettes. I recommend gum or patches to make patients and In patient who are really struggling there are prescription meds, ie chantix. Hope that helps!

Answer

If he’s willing to quit or just not do it around you speaks volumes that he cares about you and your health. Some don’t care at all. Or maybe switch to vaping or patch or gum if his addiction is that bad then no smoke smell. If he’s willing to quit all together that’s not easy. And know that you are worth it if he does. And appreciate it.

Am i wrong for this?

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