My birthday was back at the beginning of November. I usually have bad birthdays every year so it’s not a time I anticipate much. Well this year I got sick about a week and a half before my birthday so my birthday was spent recovering from the illness. (I was no longer contagious, just in recovery at that point).

My bf had something planned about two hours away that he had booked and I had no idea what it was. I had taken that weekend off of work to do stuff for my birthday so it was perfect time too. I wasn’t feeling the greatest but I was well enough to drive, function properly, and even walk around outside if it was outside. I felt a lot better than normal even if it didn’t seem like it.

He told me the morning of that he was canceling it as he didn’t see me fit enough to go and I pleaded with him to still go because I was feeling better. He said we could reschedule but I wasn’t stupid. I told him that if we canceled it that day we wouldn’t ever get around to going again. I quite literally cried to him about it because I did not want another failed birthday to add to the disappointments. He refused and canceled it anyways but promised we’d go again.

Fast forward a month and a half later and to no one’s surprise, we still haven’t gone. Whatever it was is not year round so I don’t think we will get to go before it’s over. Every time I bring it up or ask him if it’s still going on, he gets huffy and annoyed that I’m asking and then says it is but he’ll come up with excuses as to why we can’t go (some are valid like he’s not feeling well but some are just obvious excuses).

I’m frustrated because I had yet another failed birthday. And yes, it was a complete fail. It was a milestone 21st birthday, I had to be designated driver for my own outing so I couldn’t drink, and i didn’t get a present from my partner until a week later because he didn’t plan ahead and thought buying Call of Duty mw2 with what money he did have was more important than a birthday that only happens one day a year.

I am still not over this because it hurt me so much that he broke the promise to make my birthday good and broke the promise that he would make it up to me. I can’t even talk to him about it because he just gets mad. So I cry about it in private because there is nothing else I can do.