Quick bit of back story. My husband and I married in march 2022 and had our son in July 2022. In may 2022 I found out he had been having an affair since January 2022. We temporarily separated but I wanted as little stress as possible since I was heavily pregnant. Once our son was born we sort of agreed to give things a second chance. I set boundaries and ground rules and he promised he would do everything and anything I needed to earn back my trust.

Fast forward to now (December 2022) and I’ve noticed over the last 5 months or so that he just lies about everything, trivial things and insignificant things but they are still lies all the same. I confronted him about it and explained that every lie he tells regardless of what it’s about or how small he thinks it is it’s still a lie and making him more and more untrustworthy since the cheating incident. He said he only lies to avoid arguments!?! Not entirely sure how he thinks lying avoids arguments but anyway. I have explained that I haven’t forgotten or forgiven his affair and I am unhappy a lot of the time. Some times I do temporarily forget but not for long (the other woman lives over the road from us so I frequently see her).

I probably am grumpy and probably do get on at him more than usual but I feel like my entire marriage is built on a lie. I feel like I don’t even know who he is now and the continual lying isn’t helping.

Question is… how am I supposed to deal with a compulsive liar? Especially a compulsive liar who had an affair and whose lying only became apparent when he was caught?