I’ve never said this out loud-except the last part

Spending all 9 months alone. Driving myself to the hospital. Being forced to labor for 9 hours alone-only to be rushed into emergency surgery. Being strapped to that table with no family, friends, or support in sight while they delivered my son. Driving myself and my newborn baby home from the hospital. Recovering and caring for a newborn alone. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’m slightly traumatized actually. I would do it a million times over again for my son. The love I’ve been searching for is in him.