I’m not sure anymore

sunny • New

I feel like I never know if things are actually as I see them or if I make it up in my head..

Husband gets frustrated easily sometimes. He he is or we’re fighting he gets a bit more physical. Not directly at me I suppose but he starts throwing things like his phone and stuff. Today we were putting plastic over the windows cuz all our heat is escaping them. He was up on a chair and I credit carded him, something we do often to play, and I guess I did it too much or something cuz when I turned around to walk away he threw a butter knife at me, twice, cuz I called him out for trying to hit me and he did it again even harder in my direction. It didn’t make contact but could have. It’s not the first time somethings been thrown and in my direction. He’s hit me in my side when I was pregnant with his phone before because he thought I was mad or didn’t care for him or something and got frustrated. It was a while again, hard to remember. He punched the window the other night and I got upset with him cuz our baby was in the room right next to it and could have hurt her. He says he feels bad but it keeps happening.. I told him how I feel about it and how it worries me for baby’s safety. I’ve mentioned he should talk to someone and work it out if he can’t with me and hasn’t made any effort toward it. Should I set up a therapist for him or what? I feel like I’ve expressed how I feel each time it happens and it still occurred. Is this a form of abuse…almost abuse? I feel like one of these days he’ll throw something or worse and seriously hurt me or our baby. Is this all in my head ? I feel like I’m overthinking… we’ve been having issues but nothing ever that serious. He’s an amazing partner and husband when he tries and still surprises me in good ways