EDIT: I have been nothing but willing to have sex after both deliveries, we’ve never made it to the six week appointment before we’ve slept together again. It’s not me. I also don’t care if he gets himself off, that’s why I’ve provided spicy pics for him… he chose not to use them and seek out someone else’s.

I’ve been with my partner for 10 years married 9 of those. He’s the love of my life. From the beginning we’ve had a great sex life and both agreed that we didn’t want porn to be a factor in our lives and it was a form of betrayal. Ever since I had our son (5 months ago) our sex life has slowed down quite a bit but I didn’t think much of it cause it happened when I had our daughter 3 years ago too.

Two days ago while looking at his phone (I manage customer service for his business so I have to check out information on his phone with his consent frequently) I found a whole bunch of pornographic images. I confronted him about it and we talked about it. He admitted that’s he’s been doing it ever since our son was born and he did it when our daughter was born too… sometimes choosing to pleasure himself instead of having sex with me.

I’m hurt. I can’t even stand to be around him but I’m trying. I’m in my head so much, all I want to do is sleep all day. It’s been two days since the exposure and he’s already acting like he’s wanting sex telling he’s horny. I don’t want too and idk when I’ll want too. I just want things to go back to the way they were.

Has anyone gone through similar things? When did your relationship go back to normal? When did you know you were ready to be intimate again? How did you heal? Help…