When do you know it’s the right time to have a baby?

Question

I’m 26, engaged, work part time, have a mortgage..I have most of the things you’d consider when having a baby but when do you know it’s the right time?
Part of me wants to enjoy more time with my partner just us, I want to get married still, travel a bit more, get a better job. I’ve said for a while I wanted to wait till I was like 30 but I have times (like now) where I can’t help but think what if? 
I worry about fertility and I just keep thinking how much I want children idk, I guess I just wondered if anyone had any idea of when they knew they were ready?

Answer

It's hard to say. At some point you just decide to make the jump I think 😊

Answer

For me, it was when I wanted a baby more than I wanted the other things like what you mentioned.

Answer

There will never be a completely “right” time, but I think it’s a generally a good idea to avoid times when there is significant turmoil or instability in one’s life if possible (which doesn’t sound like the case for you). My life is incredibly hectic, always has been, so we decided to start trying for our first when there was a moment of calm and stability. Now we’re back to crazy. 😅
I completely understand the concerns regarding fertility. I had my first at 31, second at 33 (almost 34), and will be 35 when my third is born. We have thankfully not had issues with fertility and it is important to remember that most women DON’T until much older than you. I would have loved to have spaced 2 and 3 out more, but didn’t want to blame myself forever if we couldn’t get pregnant again.
In conclusion - It sounds like you have some ideas of how you’d like life to be before a baby comes and I think that’s great. You’re still young, so the chance of fertility problems is likely low. You could possibly also ask you OB for basic lab work to make sure you’re not risking anything obvious from a fertility standpoint by waiting. 🙂

Answer

For me it was like a switch, I went from not being ready for kids to wanting and being ready for kids. My husband and I had known each other for a long time and had been married for 7 years when we decided to try for our first. I’m 30 now and just had my baby girl 4 months ago. When I got pregnant I thought about how happy I was that we waited until we did because I felt so ready and would have struggled if it happened sooner. It’s a scary uncertain thing to think about, but when the certainty overshadows the worries I think that’s when you’ll know it’s time, if that makes sense!

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In your 30s. You’re still young you have plenty of time. Establish your career, travel, save money and enjoy that selfish time! Because once you have babies it’s allll about them 🥰

Answer

I’m 22 and a new mom.. just gave birth a  month ago.. 
I have always wanted to be a mother and a young one at that because I want to be able to enjoy them in my youth. I don’t think there is ever going to be a “right time”… just do it. There’s always going to be something in life that could be that dealbreaker factor because life isn’t perfect. Say you have a budget saved but you don’t have the time for one because your a student and have a job. There’s always going to be that “thing” but my advice would be to just take the jump. You might not get pregnant right away… it might take a couple months of trying! Who knows? That’s the beauty of it.

Answer

There will never be a perfect time, but there will be factors that are likely to make it easier. I recommend waiting until marriage for legal and tax reasons. As for the other stuff, travel and career goals (primarily for women) get a lot more difficult after kids. Both are still possible, but it’s tough. Also think of how expensive you think kids will be and then double that so I recommend putting money away for childcare well before you get pregnant.
Fertility is different for everyone, but at 30 there’s usually no issue for most people. It’s after 35 that it starts to decline, but even then it’s a gradual process and most people are still able to get pregnant relatively easily until their 40s. (Again, that’s statistically speaking. Individual health will vary).

Answer

When we had all gotten our degrees and settled into our careers. My two partners and I bought a nice house and started settling down before discussing a child. We wanted to be financially stable and I wanted to teach for a little bit before becoming pregnant. I am a public high school teacher/college professor. I had recently been hired at my university and I didn’t want pregnancy to interfere with it. I had my son at 25. I want four more. 
Everyone is different with different goals. I wanted to bring my child into the world and be able to give him everything with no worry. I wanted an amazing life for him and in order to do that we all had to reach our personal goals first and we did.

Answer

For me and my husband some of the things that were important to us before having kids were: both having jobs we enjoyed, paying off student loans, owning a home (our mortgage is our only debt), having a sizable savings, living in a city/country that we felt was good for raising kids, checking some big travel destinations off our bucket list (we did a three week backpacking trip through SE Asia right before we started TTC), and knowing that our relationship was solid enough to withstand the pressures of children. We spent A LOT of time discussing what was important to us in terms of values and how we’d like to raise our kids, how responsibility would be divided in the home, and what our goals were once we had a family.
I always thought I wanted kids young, but I met my husband when I was 20, we got married at 24, and had our first baby at 32. And I couldn’t be happier with the way we did things!

Answer

We wanted to be married and to have our covid postponed wedding and honeymoon before TTC 
Those were some of our event markers but I also made sure to get a raise before, find a new better job, had sometime married alone, have a good savings. 
Ended up conceiving at 30

When do you know it’s the right time to have a baby?

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