So...I REALLY want a baby, like MAJORLY! Well, my husband keeps saying "not yet". I had been talking to my therapist about having anxiety and about being sad about the disagreement. My therapist literally told me that by how down I get anytime I think about a baby, that I'm depressed. (Not going into anymore detail about the convo with my therapist.) I told my husband that my therapist said that...his only response? Your therapist is just saying that because they "have to be on your side". No, my therapist doesn't! I'm actually told often I'm wrong in certain life situations. I just don't know what to think about it! It's like he doesn't care that I'm depressed over it. It's a constant thought! I literally can't sleep right now because I have a baby on my mind and being told that I can't. I'm just confused! What do I do? Should I just ignore all the thoughts and not bring it up to my husband? I tried that once! It lasted for a week (that was my goal and I made it), but, I BARELY spoke to my husband because I told him "if I'm thinking about a baby, I'm not talking to you because I don't want the same old conversation". I'm just so confused about everything! Do I just not speak my thoughts anymore? Do I just hide the pain constantly? Do I keep speaking to him about it? Do I show the emotion and not tell the reason behind it?

My husband did tell me that if I "do more things for him" he'd consider one sooner. Like, "dress up" (lingerie) or make him lunch when he comes home and make everything romantic. I get him saying that stuff, and I actually already do it, just apparently not enough. But, I don't want to do it so often he expects it, he even agreed on that. I just don't know.

HELP!

Edit#1! He told me earlier today that he actually has a full plan on coming home soon and telling me that he is ready. Basically, he just wants a little more time, and he wants to have one around a break in school. I've always tried to plan the baby around his school, it's never been a question of that, just which break and which year! Also, the lingerie and romantic stuff, I hardly ever do anything out of the ordinary and I know he loves that. Now, I do it sometimes, but to me, it ruins it if it is too often. We'll just have to see what happens. PRAYING it is soon, (his soon and my soon are never the same). Wish me luck and send lots of prayers.❤️