Is this sex talk normal?

Lately I’ve been going though a rough time with my partner/boyfriend of 2 1/2 years. He suggested we have a talk about kinks and likes and dislikes and such , which I think is great however I feel like there’s something wrong w me. I feel like I don’t have much drive anymore because of all we’ve fought about and whatnot. I also feel like I never am able to please him enough cause I don’t like to swallow which he likes , I don’t like anal much cause it f***ing hurts and anal is what he likes and also pesters me about all the time about it (not sure if it’s in a joking way or not ). I just I don’t know what to say or what to do really. I feel like there’s something wrong w me and I don’t please him idk. Is this a normal conversation that people have when they’ve been together for so long? What would you guys do 🥲