Lastnight for the first time my husband and I tried anal. We’ve been together for 4 years and I never was ok with it due to my partner before him always trying to rush it and never listened to me saying stop until I was crying. If I cried he told me I was being dramatic and got mad. He made me feel so comfortable lastnight. He went at my pace, he gently was putting his penis in, he kept making sure I was ok with what he was doing, if I said ow or stop he immediately froze until I told him it was ok to continue. We tried a few different positions because he’s over a foot taller than me. He got halfway inside me and we both agreed that was enough for the first time and definitely enough for sex. Once he started like actually having sex with me I was fine until we switched positions and it hurt. I immediately wanted to panic and everything from my previous partner came back. I got extremely tense which made it hurt more. I asked him to stop and he immediately did and asked me if I was ok. I said I feel very anxious like I’m about to have a panic attack. He rubbed my back reassured me that I am ok. The biggest thing he said was “we are both learning and it is going to take some practice and I am right here we do this at your pace. I love you. You are ok and I will never do anything you do not want me to do to you.” He made me feel so comfortable. I kept saying sorry because I knew I sorta ruined it.

I guess my question is does anyone have any tips to not have an anxiety attack the second I feel pain? Or is this something I’m just going to have to work out on my own? Also any tips on a position where the height difference over a foot?

ETA: this is something that I want to do and overcome. I don’t feel pressured or anything.