How can i slowly let someone in and bring my guard down?

sara

After my ex husband and I split I saw a version of him that I never expected. It’s made me very guarded with people in general but especially dating. I don’t let people get to close because the one person I didn’t expect to become a monster became one. I have my tight circle that I truly trust with my life but when It comes to dating, I’m guarded. Looking for advice how I can slowly allow the “right ones” in. Thanks!