Tomorrow's my birthday... yay 🙄

I'm honestly struggling with it. I don't feel like I should be 30. I feel immature. And not in like I'm a childish way...more like, I have nothing to be proud about. My husband and I got married 7 years ago, when we got married I moved to a different state to be with him since he was in the Army. I didn't work for a couple months cause I was trying to get settled in, and where he was stationed did not have many options for jobs. By the time I did get a job, he was getting medically discharged cause he broke his foot. When we got to our home state, we found out I was pregnant, and I had severe morning sickness, so since he went back to work making 6 figures I stayed home, and have been since then! Yes we now have 2 children that I am proud for. But I just don't feel successful. We still rent a house, we currently only have 1 vehichle. So there's just not much to me.

On top of all this, my husband never makes my birthdays special. I wanted one specific bday gift that was well in our budget. Tonight he came home and gave me a new mop. Yes, a mop. He let our kids pick out another gift for me but idk what that is yet, it's not what I had told him I wanted. Which that's another annoyance, why ask if you're not even going to get me what I want lol. Tonight my oldest asked if we will have cake tomorrow, my husband looks at me and says "I can pick stuff up for you to bake a cake tomorrow after dinner" 😑

I might be selfish right now, idk. I'm possibly just being dramatic. But I seriously never spend money on myself. I never treat myself to anything. I never ask for a lot. If I need hygiene stuff, I buy cheap so we can spend more on the kids or my husband or put it towards something else. I'm going to be freaking 30 and I don't even feel worthy.

So I just woke up to all your replies and I want to say thank you to those who actually gave good advice, and a little bit of motivation.

For some of the questions and comments who make it as if it's just so easy to get a job or go to school. It's not lol. I can't just snap my fingers and go.

So first off yes my husband WAS making six figures when we first had a child, and for a few years. He currently isn't anymore, he's making close to that, but not as much as we were use to. During the time he was making the cash load, we did have two vehicles, we bought him a used truck out right from some person. But it has since took a crap so we don't have it anymore because it was going to be overly expensive to fix. We were also paying off a lot of debt! He had school loans to pay, which this way before the forgiveness thing so that was not an option lol. And then I had a few stupid things on my credit, and he still has a little bit more. We're close to being done, but it's not good enough to buy a house just yet.

I'm sure some will be like "well he shouldn't have taken a pay cut" and yes, taking a pay cut was a huge lifestyle change for us. But when he was making six figures he was NEVER home. He was home 1-2 times a months, I'm not even exaggerating. By the time we did have our 2nd that's when he decided to look for something else because he already felt guilty about missing our first child's first year. And trust me I'll take the family time, and having him home over the money any day.

I'd love to go back to school! I really want to do the dental hygienist program we have at our local college. My youngest is 3 though, and because of his birth date, and the school district he can't start kindergarten until he's 5, in 2 more years. We don't have family that can help watch him, none of our friends can, and preschool is stupid expensive. If I went and got a job I'd just be paying for daycare. I have looked into at home jobs but many, ok MAJORITY of them is all call center work that require complete silence and want me attached to it like any regular job would. So that wouldnt cut it with my 3 year old home. On top of that, I'd have to work during the hours my oldest is in school or we will be paying for an after school program which we wouldn't even be able to afford because we are paying so much in daycare just for the one. Our first child luckily qualified for free preschool because he had speech problems. But now that I know what kindergarten is wanting the kids to know when they enter I'll be homeschooling my youngest since he doesn't have any issues like our first did. So basically I just need to get through the next 2 years and if we can even afford me to go to school then, I will be enrolling. By then hopefully my husband will have moved up and making six figures again too.

Also we are fine with what he makes now, yes we don't have a whole lot anymore. But that's also because of the shitty economy we're in now. Our groceries have doubled so much the past 2-3 years, and we literally buy nothing special, we shop to a list, of a weekly meals I plan, and I'm always couponing and watching deals. Our electric/gas and water bills have doubled recently and it's due to stuff out of our control. Rental prices are an absolute joke! So I'm truly glad and happy so many of you can just do as you please and not face any real life obstacles, but we can't lol. We are average people just trying to get through it.