Autistic boyfriend

My partner is autistic and along side other learning disabilities he sometimes can be quite nasty with words, I knew he had his learning disabilities when I met him but it didn’t stop me getting into a relationship with him and we’ve now been together 8 years, it’s been great but as times gone by he’s shown me a different side to him, he can go weeks and weeks of being fine we get on great we have a good laugh but every few weeks he gets so nasty he will tell me that everything we have is legally his (mortgaged a home early this year) and he put a tiny more towards the house than me purely because it was more than we expected and he had managed to save more, I pay him back monthly for this extra payment he made, he tells me that everyone knows that I live off him, I don’t we both have paid full time jobs we both pay the same towards bills, but because he has a little more money than me he likes me to feel like I’m dependent on him almost. For example one time he dropped me into work and decided to tell me that he wasn’t going too work today because I didn’t ‘wash his uniform correctly’ and that I had to tell his work mate that he wouldn’t be there, so I did, his work mate then got angry and said he needed my partner too ring the boss so the boss knew, my partner then began to tell me that I was setting him up to be bullied at work, also very often he tries to accuse me of stealing money and that I ‘mentally abuse’ a disabled person if I even try fight my own corner, im just not sure what to do, it’s only since we moved into our own place he’s gotten really bad.

I miscarried 3 days ago and he never even bothered to ask if I was okay he’s completely avoided it, and yes I know he’s probably hurting too but I’m just at a lost cause now. It gets worse every time he has one of these episodes