My husband and I have been together for 9yrs now and married for 8yrs. I used to buy him pretty much whatever he wanted because he told me how his mother and father never bought him anything for birthdays, Christmas, or even school clothes so I knew it would mean a lot to him. I never asked him for anything and our relationship was pretty much good. About 5 yrs in, I was making about $7 an hr less than him and needed help on some bills and that’s when I first saw his other side. He was extremely mad at me that I even asked him for anything and told me I needed to just get a better job or whatever so I did. Eventually he gave me a little money but not before making me feel like crap for asking him for something. Any time he would buy me a gift it would be the cheapest of that item he could find. Meanwhile I’m buying hi PlayStation 4’s (our house was broken into a few times so I ended up replacing it 3 times . Now since Ps5 has come out I got him one, an Apple Watch 7 he wanted when it first came out, air pods, he always want Jordans, and whatever else. I helped him get a car about 6 months in of us talking. He’s gotten a little better in the gift giving since I’ve complained about it but anytime I ask him for anything he gets super upset. I realized a few years ago how selfish he was and was really preparing to leave him but he made it seem like he was gonna change his ways so of course I stayed with him. I have 4 kids from a previous marriage and 2 by him, and 6 months pregnant with our 3rd together. About a year and a half ago he came to me and said he saw a video about narcissists and he realized he is one and he is going to leave me alone because he doesn’t want to hurt me. When I started looking at videos about narcissists I couldn’t believe that they described him to a T. I thought he was just selfish but he really has a personality disorder. Now we’ve gotten on a cycle of him yelling at me telling me I need to move out and find somewhere else to live (we own our home) and he will be so glad when I go, then when I go to an apt and pay a deposit to apply to an apartment he’ll beg me to stay and I end up losing my deposit and stay 🤦🏾‍♀️. We’re usually ok until he says he’s going to do this or that and then doesn’t and I call him on it and then he says I just want him to spend all of his money. He used to always say he was saving for a rainy day for us in case anything happened since we moved from

MD to TX just me, him and the kids a year into our relationship. Now we’re 9 yrs in with over $25,000 in savings and he still acts the same way whenever I ask him for anything. I rarely even ask him for anything but if I do all hell breaks loose. My sister has always tried to convince him to leave him but I end up staying. Just today we were supposed to be going on a weekend trip to San Antonio but the weather there was bad so we stayed home. He said he would spend the $2,000 for the trip and I could just save my money. Of course I was excited because he never does that I have to go half on anything we do vacations included. We decided to take the kids skating, to an indoor water par, and go out to eat on Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. He would end up spending no more than $1,000 maybe even $1,200 if you want to put it on the higher end. We’ve been driving my vehicle everywhere so I asked him could he put some gas in since it was running low. He snapped on me and cursed me out and sis he was already gonna have to spend $2,000 so no. I broke it down to him that he wasn’t going to spend anywhere near that and he threw out there that he had to pay my $50 copay when we end for my ultrasound appointment yesterday and the fact that he had to drive. He always wants me to drive us everywhere even though I can barely even fit comfortably behind the steering wheel with my big belly. I’ve been driving him around for years and he’s mad because I’ve asked him to drive the last two times we went somewhere together. I reminded him that I do not get Medicaid and I pay over $300 a month out of my paycheck for me and the kids to have health insurance so paying a $50 copay is nothing since once the bill is finalized I usually end up getting billed another $125 out of pocket. Plus for my regular OB appointments that he doesn’t go to I have a $35 copay that I have to pay that I’m the one that pays and I pay the difference once the final bill comes in. He will go half on school clothes or summer clothes and things like that but he always complains when I ask him for anything. I used to understand since the kind of childhood he had makes him want to hang on to his money but now that I can’t afford to just but him any and everything but he’s in a position to do that for me if he wanted to and doesn’t of course but he’ll just say well you don’t really but me anything. I’ve bought him 95% of the shoes he owns, 99% of the clothes he wears and he’s always talking about what I don’t do for him. Not to mention every argument leads to him saying “im done with you why don’t you just find you somewhere else to go”. I’ve been trying to just ignore it because I know once I start looking he’ll be trying to stop me but when is the time to just walk away and do it on my own? I’d rather be single than I’ve a man that hates doing anything for me but loves getting stuff from me? Just last week he lost one of his air pods and I replaced them with the latest version and paid almost $300 and he still had the nerve to say this morning I never buy him anything. I spent over $1,600 on him for his birthday on January 30th and he says that doesn’t count because it was his birthday 🙄. He tried to guilt trip me that the kids will hire me because obviously I can only afford an apartment at this point and probably not in the best neighborhood because rent is super expensive in Texas but I’m really getting tired. The last time I had an approval for a place about a month ago he called me all kinds of bitches and told me it was on from them on out but then he called me and said he loved me and we need to do therapy or counseling or something it he doesn’t want to live without me. Of course I bought into it because it hurts to leave him but you don’t have to ask if we ever did the counseling. He doesn’t even apologize for what he says usually he’ll just try to change the subject and act like he never said anything wrong. I love him but the narcissistic traits he has are just too much for me. I feel sorry for him because we are all each other has out here but at the same time he doesn’t mind hurting my feelings about anything. I don’t know whether I should just try not to ask him for anything and we’ll be done or just to know my worth and be single until I find a man that doesn’t mind doing for me like I won’t mind doing for him. Our 3yr old daughter loves him to death and she’s always looking for him as soon as she hits the door from daycare but I feel she can just call him on the phone until she can see him on the weekends. I know this was a lot and still lot when half of the story but I just want to know if it’s time to go or what? How many times does a man have to say he doesn’t want you and easy for yon to be home before you believe what he says and leaves? Thank id you’ve made it this far reading 😊. Oh and the reason we drive my vehicle all the time is because he says I have a few thousand less miles than he does and he doesn’t want to run up the poles on his car in case he wants to trade it in. Even though he now says he probably won’t but he pretty much won’t take his car unless he’s driving to work. Another one of his selfish ways…