Background: this is my first baby, I am 26 and extremely excited to be starting a family. I have always had a strained relationship with my mum as she has let me down a lot in my life. So when I told my mum I was pregnant the first thing she ask was whether should could be there when i give birth. I agreed she could be there because I have always pictured that she would be there for me, just as she was for my sister when she had her two children. My mum recently told me that she has booked an overseas holiday for the week before my due date (even though she know he is likely to be induced early).

There is a very high chance that she will now miss the most important moment of my life which has been extremely hurtful for me. Don’t get me wrong I don’t need her there but the fact that she would risk missing something that she was supposedly so excited for is so hurtful and hard for me to get over.

I now don’t want her there whether she is around or not because in my opinion it is an honour to be able to share this moment with me and my husband which I now feel she doesn’t deserve. The only problem is I do not want to have that conversation with her so I would rather just not even tell her when I’m going into labour and she can find out after the fact.

Is this too harsh?