Husband and his narcissistic mother

My husband always chooses his family over me. We constantly get into fights about his toxic mother and he never has my back about anything even when she’s completely wrong. She neglected him as a kid and he moved with his with his grandparents at 14. He’s never had a good relationship with her and she never asked about him. Until we had our first child she came back into the picture. She now manipulates him and give him money to like her. When he’s mad at her he’ll talk shit about her. But when I get bother by her for something she said to me he doesn’t have my back and starts making me the problem he’ll even get really nasty with what he says and call me names but says I’m immature when all I’m trying to do is express my feelings. They both think she should have grandma right when I absolutely do not agree she calls to see my child every 3 months or so and he expects me to be up and ready like why are we at her command of when she gets to see my child. So much I can go on about it would take me forever. But why is it this way I don’t understand I’ve been by his side the whole time through all his ups and alots of downs but I feel like he doesn’t even care…