I know they say not to even consider divorce in the first year after your child is born but I’ve just come to the conclusion that my husband sucks and I don’t want anything to do with him. In the beginning he was really supportive of me breastfeeding. He followed me around with water, made my plate if I was nursing during dinner, made sure I was comfortable and had everything I needed. But that quickly changed. I know now I don’t necessarily need those things bc my baby is bigger and I am able to get up and grab the things I need at least. But I haven’t been able to master nursing in the carrier so I only have one free arm while nursing. He’s constantly been complaining that he has to do a majority of the dishes, even though I do all of the pump parts and shields separately. He complained today while I was washing the pump parts and shields bc the baby was crying and I was taking too long. He won’t help with the baby unless she’s already calm prior to me asking him to keep an eye out while I do something. Today he told me to quit laying on his side of the bed bc my dirty hair is causing him to have pimples and if I showered more often it wouldn’t be so greasy. Yet I can’t shower unless I get my baby laid down early bc he won’t help. I got mastitis 2 weeks ago and he insisted I give her formula bc he’s tired of this crap. I stuck my ground and we’re still breastfeeding but I spent this weekend nursing on demand while my baby was cluster feeding and power pumping in order to increase my supply since due to mastitis I am now an underproducer when pumping at work. He told me it’s my fault I’m an under supplier bc I don’t eat right. Yet I have no time to eat regularly bc I have no help with my stage 5 clinger! He spent the entire day today sleeping and then had the nerve to call me lazy and tell me to quit using breastfeeding as an excuse to sit on my ass all day once he woke up and saw I didn’t fold my laundry or do the regular dishes. He didn’t acknowledge that I’d been taking care of the dogs all day, taking care of the baby, a 6 yo, an 8 yo, gave all the kids baths, fed them all their meals and am still up trying to get my baby settled while he got to go to bed bc he has to get up at 4 to work even though I asked him to just hold her so I could get myself dinner and shower. I still haven’t had dinner or showered. I get way less sleep than him bc I don’t go to bed until 9-10 when my baby finally goes to sleep, she wakes around 12, 3 and 5 to nurse and I do all of that by myself and then have to be ready to leave for work and take my kids to school and daycare by 7:15. But he says taking care of the baby by myself was my choice when I decided to breast feed. I’ve tried explaining there are other things he can help with but he literally refuses. He does do the majority of the house work and takes care of the dogs but he bitches every second of every day about it. He says we have no connection anymore, probably because I can’t stand him as a person anymore. I’ve tried to just ignore it and do what I know I need to do but the constant complaining and disrespect is getting old. If he wants to not help with the baby then the least he could do is take care of the housework and dogs without complaining. I could get behind that. But taking care of the baby by myself along with him breathing down my neck is downright exhausting and causing me even more stress. Is this just the life of a breastfeeding mom or is he just a POS finally showing his true colors after 5 years together?

To be clear we chose to have this baby together, she wasn’t an accident. My big kids were almost 2 and 4 when we moved in together and he was so great with them. Idk what changed.