I’m bothered. My partner and I were hanging out today—- he wanted to have sex—- I told him only if he wore protection bc it’s not worth my peace of mind. (I don’t want to get pregnant). He basically wants to use the pull out method and I’m not comfortable doing that—- but I’ve allowed it a time or two—- after discussing it the first few times he told me he wouldn’t put me in that position again bc he knows it mentally worries me. Today I told him we could have sex if he wore a condom and he said no I don’t wanna do that so just give me head—- I wasn’t in the mood to give him head—- long story short bc he was unwilling to put on a condom —- as I’m laying in his bed he goes to the bathroom to Jack-off….. he came back in the room and I pretended to be asleep—- he got in bed turned the other way and went right to sleep. I’m bothered but I’m not sure why I’m so bothered—- maybe bc seconds prior to this we were relaxing in bed on this cold day enjoying one anothers company—- he was telling me how much he loves me, sweet kisses, etc…. And then this? im trying to pin-point what it is that bothers me about this and I don’t know—- maybe it’s bc he would rather Jack-off in the bathroom than to just put on a condom and be intimate with me????? He describes it as wearing a “trash bag” but I’ve slept with other men who wore the bare skin ones and I have never had complaints…. I wish this didn’t bother me bc I feel dumb for it—- but I also don’t wanna bring it up and start a stupid fight. Not exactly sure what exactly I’m looking for by posting this, maybe I just need to get it out..? Idk.

Side note: this is the first time this has ever happened.