I have 2 bio children and 2 bonus kids. I have a now 16 year old daughter and 12 year old son and have a 12 year old bonus daughter and 15 year old bonus son. My step kids are with us majority of the time. They go with their mom two weekends a month. My daughter turned 16 recently and for her birthday she wants to go do a scary escape room. I said okay. The escape room takes place at night and my bonus son is on the spectrum and scared of the dark and doesn't like scary things. He already got overwhelmed and started crying when we asked if he even wanted to go so he clearly didn't. So I'm gonna take the kids and my husband is gonna stay home with my bonus son. My bonus daughter told their mom about the escape room and she's so excited about it but their mom found out that way that my bonus son is being left out. She called my husband angry and he tried to explain to her that he's too scared and she said that my daughter should choose to do something else for her birthday that includes everyone. We are already all going out to eat and he will be there for that. She thinks I'm purposely trying to leave her son out and my daughter should stop being selfish and so something he can do. It's her birthday and I think she should be able to spend it how she wants. I understand he can't handle the escape room and my husband will be with him keeping him company. If my biological son has the same issue I would have him stay home too. I don't see how I'm wrong.