I cant seem to get off while masterbating. I never really have. The only time I've orgasmed is when someone else has done it to me.

When I get close my whole body seems to tense up makes it difficult to hold a toy or to any movement.

Can anyone have advice on this?

Its also tough because I seem to need both penetreation and clitoral but the toys that do both don't reach right. Plus the i contract hard just before and it will push out any toys. You have to really try to keep it in which is hard for contracted hands.