I’m just done hurting

I just can’t even believe that this is my life right now. I am heartbroken to say the least. I am also full of anger and resentment and I have so many questions that went unanswered. I just wonder why I was never good enough to be his wife after almost a decade together, and engaged for 6 of those years. Talked about marriage many of times and even set a date to which he backed out on twice. Back and forth for 6 years on why we haven’t gotten married yet. Everything has come before me/us and I’m so sick of it. Back and forth saying I’m the love of his life and how he can’t wait to make me his wife to he’s unhappy and wants to work on our relationship before getting married. 10 years man. I’m so dumb..Still expects me to pretend like I’m ok and everything’s ok, and I’m just done being strung along.