Am I overreacting or should I bring it up?

Question

I’ve noticed that when in my relationship (I’m 16 he’s 17 and Qwe’ve been together 7 months)  that there’s something that’s really unbalanced. I’m always the one that asks if he wants to go on dates and then plans said dates.

And when it comes to gifts I get him more gifts and more expensive gifts. For Christmas he got me a few cheap prizes from an arcade and for my birthday he got me a mug and a hedgehog plush from Rome (school trip). While I got him touch bracelets for Christmas and legos, matching onesies, and a stuffed animal for his birthday. I’ve also gotten him flowers, but he’s never gotten me any.

Here’s where I think I’m overreacting, I’m the type of person that needs to know where and what time are we going a few days in advance, he is more go with the flow type person and not as much of a planning type person. And for gifts I really enjoy giving gifts, and he is currently searching for a job while I’ve had one since June.

Im his third girlfriend ever and I don’t want to make him feel as if he is a terrible boyfriend or make him sad, should I say something or should I accept that it’s just the way it is and to move on. The rest of our relationship is perfect, it’s just that that’s bothering me

Answer

He's searching for a job so that explains why he didn't get you gifts that compare to what you got him. Other than that, you need to have a talk with him and tell him how you feel. Communication is very important.

Answer

Totally overreacting! You guys are so young, especially a boy being 17 and you expect him to buy you items like a grown man with a degree and a full time job? stop being materialistic and enjoy the presence with him, you mentioned everything else is perfect. Let it be and let him grow into the man you want him to be!

Answer

Communication is key here. It helps in any relationship to have a gifts discussion—set a price limit you both are comfortable with and discuss which gift-giving holidays you both want to participate in. With planning dates, have another discussion to talk about your expectations and then give him the opportunity to plan some dates.

Answer

Well he doesn’t have a job so probably doesn’t have money to spend. So he’s not gonna wanna arrange a date with no money and buy gifts when he has no money. Also he sounds like he is giving you something - it really is the thought that counts, not price

Answer

If he doesn't have a job, how is he going to buy you gifts and plan dates? I think if you like him, and especially if you love him, then you should be patient and wait for him to get a job and see how things go. Maybe in the meantime, tone down your giftgiving and maybe just don't do too much. Plan free or low-cost dates. This way you won't feel too much resentment, and feeling as though you are doing so much more.

Answer

The job stuff is understandable, however you should not be the one planning and paying for the dates. There was this girl who said the guy she was seeing didn't have money to take her on dates EVER. She would always come to his place because of it, and she would bring them both food. One day, they drove to a gas station foe her to buy snacks and he paid for cigarettes and alcohol for HIMSELF. Lesson? A guy will pay for things he values, in this case: smoke and drinks. He didn't even see value in making sandwiches to take her to the park for a picnic. I'm not saying this is your boyfriend, you guys are so young but now is the time to sharpen the wants and needs that make you happy. Set reasonable but high standards. Say like "Hey I understand money is tight, but I would appreciate if you put in effort to cook for us and do a romantic setup in the living room or something." Don't fall into societies "Grand Gesture" culture, but learn to do and receive intentional gestures towards each other. Also never train a man that you will pay for everything, that's how you end up in a relationship when you're courting him. Good luck!!

Answer

@GlowGPT please help me with this topic!

Am I overreacting or should I bring it up?

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