Hi! My fiancé and I are just starting the wedding planning process, and made a rough draft guest list to try to get a headcount before picking a venue etc etc. We both agreed that we don’t particularly want young children or babies at our wedding for a few reasons.

1. They could potentially get hurt and/or mess up things on tables if they’re running around and playing too rough. I really want a champagne tower and can’t imagine how scary that would be if a child knocked it over. Same with the cake etc. Not only could a kid get injured, but even if they were unharmed, we only get one chance to enjoy that cake/those drinks/whatever it may be. There aren’t really re-do opportunities for things like that. 😅

2. They might cry, talk, scream, or get antsy during the ceremony. It’s not their fault - they’re little and just trying to communicate. But we don’t want to chance any disruptions during such a special moment.

3. We would still have to pay for their food (maybe half price - but still) and they most likely won’t eat it! The kids in my family are quite picky, and it’s already astronomically expensive to feed everyone at a wedding… I don’t want to waste money and food, knowing they’re not going to eat it anyway.

When I mentioned this to my mom, she warned me that my cousins might not take kindly to their children being excluded. (Ages by the time of our wedding will range from 1 yr - 7 yrs) My fiancé and I both absolutely adore my cousins’ children, but I didn’t realize that might be a dealbreaker and strain relationships with my cousins. I know it can be a touchy subject, but I thought it would be clear that we love those kids but just want an adults only wedding. + I know my cousins would be able to arrange childcare if they decided to attend our wedding and didn’t bring the kids. I know it’s becoming more common to have adults only, or age restrictions at weddings.

I’m curious to hear outside opinions. Have any of you had adults only weddings? How did it go? Were any relationships strained or damaged by excluding children and babies?

Would any of you be offended if a family member asked that you not bring your young children to their wedding?