Im so heartbroken, i just had our last baby 2 weeks ago… i grabbed his phone while he was showering and found the messages in his recently deleted. On his free sundays he goes to the lake with friends to release some stress since we do have a business that keeps him busy a lot. Theres more to the messages like talking about meeting up on a sunday at the lake & he even looked for a lake thats near her , i feel so so so betrayed. He denied 2 of our kids, we actually have 4 kids. All i could do is sit & cry. He tried to gaslight me saying that i dont show him love & affection anymore, that its my fault because at nights i turn my back on him when he wants to hug. Like really, come on now. I knew better than to let him gas light me. I was pumping my milk out sitting in a chair in the living room & here he comes saying “lets talk, let me explain it to you please” tears rolled down my face even faster and he hugged me but was not hugged back, i told him to please leave me alone & go to sleep and he walked away. How do i leave with 4 kids, how do i break my family apart? I grew up with divorced parents and all i ever wanted my whole childhood was for my parents to be together. What would you do, what do i do? I ignored him so bad he didn’t get a chance to “explain” to me anything.