Things changed in my marriage for the worse after babies

My husband and I had the fairytale…. We were so in love and always loved being together spending quality time that is both our love language. We preferred being with each other over anyone else. Not just honeymoon stage it lasted a while 5 years. Well we had our baby and everything changed and a second they are 17 months apart. I am a Sahm and he makes me feel like I have it easy and he says he doesn’t resent me but I know he does. He denies it. He says I get overwhelmed and frazzled and needs him etc because I like to do things as a family and hang out when he gets off work early. He still goes to play golf with his friends here and there . I don’t get frazzled or overwhelmed he perceives me that way and it is frustrating because I was only a bit overwhelmed to go out alone when I had my first born who was about 20 months and my newborn and he would compare me to other mothers who go out on there own by now etc. he also says I sigh or make him feel bad when he goes to play golf. He gets alone time too because we barely hang out when the kids go to sleep he watches what he wants etc. I have been asking him if we are ok financially to go away for a day or two … he said he feels the reason we haven’t is because I am “overwhelmed” and when he goes on work trips he feels I am upset etc. it’s so frustrating because to have my husband perceive me so wrong hurts. He makes me feel like he thinks I’m incapable. I am more than capable. I take care of our babies with ease and by myself, I take care of our home, cook. Bring him his lunch (he works from home)… he was gone for a week on a work trip and I am fine. I don’t complain. I don’t know if he is truly happy. Sometimes it seems he misses life before kids. I feel like he needs space. I also feel like he projects feelings onto me making it seem like it’s me. I’ve said to him we should go away etc and today he says we haven’t cause he feels I am overwhelmed by the boys and going away…

Idk I’m at a loss this created an argument I started crying because being perceived by my husband this way is sad and he got mad at me for being upset when I’ve told him numerous times and explained the reasons I am not overwhelmed etc .. he started cursing at me telling me to fucking drop it he’s soooo sick of this. I said I was good until this comment then I tried talking it out and he repeated to curse etc.