My dad asked me if I saw my BIL’s new garage. He put a car lift in it because he’s a mechanic. I said I hadn’t seen it but I’ve heard about it. My dad goes on to explain that it’s like if I opened the door to my house and instead of seeing what’s actually in my house, it was a mansion. I asked what he meant and my sister jumped in and said she thinks he means it’s like if you walked into my house and it was like unexpectedly really nice and awesome. I didn’t think it was rude at the time but I was thinking about it after and realized wtf?

My dad also lent me a usb to share some photos with me and there were like 15ish other files in the folder. He told me I could take a look if I wanted. He put them there specifically because it was a new usb drive. I opened them and there was a letter to my brother about how proud he was of him, a letter to my sister also saying how proud he is of her, and nothing to me. My dad left my mom when I was literally a few weeks old so I’ve never expected a real fatherly bond with him but now that I have a child I’m trying to foster a relationship between them so my son knows his grandpa. I also have very little other family nearby.

After our visit I asked if he’d be in the area if he could stop by and help my husband carry a piece of furniture upstairs. I don’t usually ask for favors from him, I actually don’t think I ever have. He has offered help before, like when we moved houses he helped drive a trailer back and forth and spent about 3 hours with us driving round trip, but he offered to do it. In response he said he will help, and followed it up by saying one day he’s going to ask my husband to help him move a 600 pound safe into his basement as payback for ‘all these little favors’ he’s done for us. I sometimes go weeks or months not talking to him and I never knew this was a building issue. Last week he came to my house and took my 2 year old son for a walk for the first time ever so I could get some work done at home. I guess that’s what he’s referring to?

And there are just random unnecessary comments here and there. A few weeks ago he said my son was just like me except without the ‘mask’. I asked what does that mean and he said without the facade of being nice. I’m a SAHM and he thinks I should go back to work because my ‘only contribution to society right now is picking up my son’s crayons off the floor’.

Lastly he doesn’t really look in my eyes when he talks to me, and when he’s at my house he really only talks to my husband.