My children’s father & I are working on getting back in a relationship because we’re now in a better space individually and figure we’d give it another try. He mentions today he wants to go on a trip next year without our children, it’s an immediate no for me. We have VERY young children and the time he wants to go they’ll only be 1&2 years old. I say to him “well why can’t the kids come?” & of course it’s all about sex on why he doesn’t want them to come. I tell him pretty much there’s nobody I trust to leave them with without either one of us around and he suggests his mother and I say absolutely not. For context I have told him that I don’t feel comfortable with my children being around his father and they’re not allowed to be around him without HIS supervision. He was VERY abusive to him during his childhood and even told his sister 3 years ago that he treats her the way he does because she looks like HIM so how do you think he feels about YOUR children?! His mother never said anything about the abuse and even backed him up at one point. So why would I take a vacation and leave our children with your mother who clearly didn’t even protect her own children? I honestly don’t see why he doesn’t have the same pov? Like I get that it’s his family but it isn’t making sense. I’m honestly not willing to compromise about this either, even if they were older.. I would arrange for them to stay with my mother.