My daughter is 5 and is currently going through a phase where she's just doing things to be mean. We had this problem the beginning of the school year. She was just being a bully. She's doing a little better at school but has been mean to my step son. He's 15 and living with us because his mom won't leave her boyfriend and he's witnessed a lot of DV. Also has been dealing with bullying. He has a caseworker and a therapist. She would just say really mean things like he doesn't have a mom. Had torn his books. And shes been receiving consequences. She has started to stop a little but we went to the park to have a bbq. My mom was there too because she really wanted to see my daughter. My daughter decided to go to run around to people at the park and tell them her step brother still wets his bed which is an issue he's been struggling with. I told her to stop embarrassing him or we are going home. She did it again and was basically yelling it and then he got upset and embarrassed and stormed off. So I kept what I said and told her now she's in trouble and we are going home. She started crying and my mom started undermining my parenting and telling me I'm being too harsh and she's only 5. I told her that her being 5 makes it even more important to instill boundaries in her. It starts young. My mom said I'm making her granddaughter cry and I said she's crying because she's in trouble. She started fighting with me and saying I'm being too harsh and she started old me a good mom doesn't pick a step child over my flesh and blood. She pretty much called me a bad mom. If I don't prove to my daughter she will have consequences she will just keep acting out and being rude. My mom thinks he's 15 and he's fine he can get over it. But I'm not trying to add on anymore reasons for him to self harm. I'm not trying to pick anything over anyone.