Severe Health Anxiety

I suffer from the most debilitating health anxiety. To start I am overall anxious person but I had almost a near death experience which made it even worse. And This past November my safety net and my everything passed away..my mom. When I was about 19 years old I almost died from a PE in my lung which had initially gone undetected by the first hospital I went to because they chalked it up to anxiety. Its only when my leg blew up and turned purple did another hospital take me seriously. That severely affected my trust in doctors. Since then it had reoccurred 2 times and they arent sure why. All testing has come back normal, I am on thinners the rest of my life. Now and then I will still get leg pain, I rush to the hospital thinking Im dying and all testing comes back clear. Its embarrassing the amount of times Ive been to the hospital. After my mom got sick and eventually passed it turned it up even more. I can barely leave my house without the fear of something happening. I go to work and home. I don’t go to the grocery store. I am so depressed because I want to do things but my anxiety is holding me back. I feel like I do well and then have major setbacks. I want to try therapy again to see if it helps. Im also on Buspar twice a day that only seems to help so much. I feel so lost….