Hello ladies, I hope you guys are doing well! This post is long so sorry in advance..

When I was 15 years old I was pregnant & had my son @16. I worked & took care of my son myself *obviously my responsibility * & I lived with my mother & 2 older sisters. My sisters also had kids *just one each* that was 1 year old & a couple months. @16 my Mom asked me to stop working so I can take care of my sisters kids while her & my sisters worked.. in exchange she said she would help me buy some stuff my son needed. i agreed only cause my Mom always had a temper & wanted things her way.. anyways, i took care of my sisters kids for YEARS! & when i tried to work at jobs it wouldnt be for long since my Mother said she rather have me babysit while they worked & my sisters didnt want to do daycare since they would say it's expensive. i never once got

paid all those years!! when i got older *23 years old* i started getting paid. when i got paid i would buy what i needed for the kids & save the rest. i would try to work but it only made my mother mad she didnt want me to work whatsoever.. i even tried to get a car once so i could stop relying on her for rides to my kid app's & mine but she snapped & called me selfish🤦🏻‍♀️. she controlled all my life & she never really taught me or my sisters responsibility that comes in life. never talked to us about sex, paying bills, how to build credit etc. my Mother grew up with lots of trauma & she is a serious cold woman who snaps if things dont go her way. She never been affectionate or anything.. There’s soooo much that has happened & I wish I could talk to someone about it. But fast forward to now we live in a new house we been in it for 4 years. We rent it. My name is on the least & so is my Mom & 1 of my sister. My Mom wanted me to stay home of course to take care of my niece still & they continued to pay whenever & to buy what my son needed *sometimes! Cause his dad side does A LOT for him that I am grateful!* my Mom decided she wants a new life.. she moved to PR with my sister with her name still on the least & mine too. I’m here in the house with my other sister who’s name isn’t on it & she pays half the bill. I brought my boyfriend *who’s a now ex!* to live with us so he can rent since he needed a place to stay. So he pays the bill as well too with us. I’m 25! Now let’s just say life is whooping me & I am clueless.. my Mom didn’t teach us anything especially me. I know nothing about life! Idk what to do.. she was one of the people who didn’t want me to do anything!!! Now that she’s gone & the house is my responsibility & I am currently not working so my ex & sister is paying the bill it’s just hard. 2024 is draining me & I am mentally losing it💔I am living in a world & idk how to do anything! But I am grateful for this year too ofc because once my Mom left I took some steps.. I got my physical done in Jan 2024, went to get my permit somewhere between Feb-March 2024. I brought my first car in April 2024! *a friend of mine put it in his name to help me cause I didn’t have my license * August 2024! I went to a CNA class Monday-Friday & did clinical & graduated Sep 19th. But while doing school i got my license Sep 14th of this year! So im very proud of myself! This is all things my mother didn’t want for me & she tried to not make me go/do. I have to wait now to take my state test to officially be a CNA. But as im sitting here waiting there’s things falling apart & I feel so helpless & depressed💔. My ex & I argue daily! He is very aggressive *not hands on* he triggers me daily he just developed a nasty character that is controlling & just plain nasty *heart is cold* . I don’t want to be around him at all! I want to escape this. But I feel clueless.. my Mom is in PR she tells me my only option is moving to PR with my father who NEVER been in my life or live with a friend.. but the thing is that friend has a obsession with me & I keep a distant with him. He does witchcraft & there’s times he disrespected me multiple times. He tries to force his love on me even when I tell him I’m not interested. Those my only options my Mom says I have. I don’t have any credit. I only have a car & waiting to take my state test for CNA & $8K now to my Name🤦🏻‍♀️I feel hopeless I feel like a waste of space. What can I do??? How can I get a place for me & my son? A safe place. That’s what stressing me out cause I have no credit & currently not working. My sister said I have $8K it’s enough for a deposit & the months rent etc. but I tell her it’s hard to find a place in my position.. no one would accept me. My family looks the other way & rather have me without a place to live at.. I know the story jumps to certain parts in life & im sorry. I just have a lot in me & im confused.. if anyone could be kind & message me? Or give advice I’d appreciate it.. thank you!