so i’m having quiet the dilemma. i really want to try for our third and last baby, but the issue is that for some reason im terrified of giving birth. i’m actually terrified something will happen to me during labor. i didn’t feel this fear with my first two so i don’t understand why im having this fear. my first pregnancy was great, i only had four hours of labor and 30 mins of pushing. my second wasn’t too bad BUT she was 6 weeks early and i was in labor for 20 hours and pushed twice. the hospital i went to wasn’t through my obgyn because they didn’t have a nicu so i went an hour away from home. they gave me an iud right after birth and didn’t cut the strings which was awful. i didn’t even know they gave me an iud. she asked what birth control i wanted and i said i wanted an iud because i’ve had it before, but i thought she means afterwards! i had an epidural so i had no idea what was going on! my regular ob was shocked that happened and he took it out thank god. but that’s the only traumatic thing i had which wasnt life threatening but i did have a scary preterm labor… but i didn’t have any health complications and neither did my baby. my youngest is 2 now, and my husband has some issues “down there” that may prevent him from having kids in the future so that’s another reason why i want to have a baby soon. im not sure why i have such bad anxiety over my health with this pregnancy. i think most of it is the fear of leaving behind my two daughters. i have such a fear of stroke, heart attack, blood clot, seizure, and bleeding out after birth.

i’m a very healthy person with no medical issues and im aware even healthy people can have these things happen.