Horny and loney. even though my sex life is shit due to MS. I hate that i dont have a man to be with to celebrate holidays and do life together. I see both of my sisters happy with their man when they come over but then its like what about me. I have no social life because once again with this. I use to not be insecure but now i am about everything. I hate it. I hate going to sleep alone and waking up alone. I hate when we are all together on holidays and here is single Morgan. But then again part of it is me and the thoughts i have. Growing up christian i was told and always believed sex before marriage was a sin and it was ways dirty. I never had any guy friends or brothers. Well now 2 who will be my brother in laws but actual brothers. Going back to the horny part for almost 35 years its just been me getting off and not me getting any pleasure. When i try to have sex with a guy its always me pleasuring him and him not pleasuring me so in the end i dont know what its like to have sex with a guy and feel that connection. I guess i kind want to say im giving up on life in a way where it involves me being happy and loved and not happy and loved by my family.