I want to find something to believe in

I currently do not believe in anything. I grew up catholic and I learned that I really do not like catholic religion. I feel like the strict rules within catholic religion made me have no relationship with god. I struggled a lot as a kid and committed about every sin possible. My husband is Christian and believes in god. My kids even believe in god and I let them go to different type of church events within our community. We have had talks about going to church but I do not think I’m ready for that big of a leap. I thought about watching a live streaming of a Christian sermon online but I’m still like nervous I’m doing it wrong. Someone give me some advice on how to get started with this cause I’ll be honest I feel like I’m doing it all wrong.