Would you let your MIL invite people she knows to your baby shower?

Question

My husband and I are going to have a baby shower and I was told by my husband that my mother in law is going to be inviting her nieces and nephews and her whole family, whom I don’t speak to and my husband HARDLY speaks to them. He told me he had no plans of inviting them. No she isn’t helping with anything but she is allowing us to have the baby shower at her house. But I don’t think that gives her the right to invite whoever she wants, I want it to be invite ONLY. As in if me or my husband send someone the e-invite, they’re invited and need to RSVP. People are telling me this might be a good thing because the more people the more gifts, but I honestly don’t care. Has this happened to anyone else? Or how did you go about the invites for your baby shower?

Answer

I’m not sure I see the big deal. It’s all family, it’s a good time to meet people and be celebrated. Sound like she’s excited about baby.

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I do see your side, but it is her house and family. I wouldn’t feel comfortable telling someone who’s allowing me to host a party at their home who they can and can’t invite. And like others said, look on the bright side, more gifts!

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I think it's kind of odd that family wouldn't be invited on both sides. It's her house too. We definitely had people from both sides of the family at my shower. I wanted my MIL to be comfortable and have who she wanted there. What's the deal with your relationship? I guess you could make this into a big deal and put your foot down for no compromises, but don't expect it to be a good thing for your relationship with her. You talk as if providing a venue isn't a big enough contribution for her to have any say, but that is a very generous contribution in my opinion.

Answer

It’s your baby shower, she doesn’t have the right to invite people to it. Tell her that it’s not an open invite and that only people that are invited by you and your husband are allowed to go. I’m sure she wouldn’t like if you started to invite a pile of people to an event of hers

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It sounds like it’s all family, no? And family that he just doesn’t talk to, not that he’s cut off because they did something bad. So I don’t see an issue here. It’s her house and only family.

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Well like everyone it’s saying the more people the more gifts for your cutie!! 🤣 At my baby shower there was people I didn’t know too well but it was a surprise baby shower thou so I did not got to plan for it.