hi so i’m in a situation and i have had a weird gut feeling like i’m being groomed.

backstory is me and my girlfriend are both 17, turning 18 later this year and we have been together for coming up 2 years. we’re in a country where the legal age of consent is 16. we have talked about possibly hooking up with a guy to see what it would be like since both of us have only been with eachother. we’ve also discussed possibly being poly and maybe if we both liked someone we would consider being in a relationship with them.

so fast forward about 6 months and my girlfriend starts at a course and meets some cool people there, one of them being this guy who is 22. they were friends for a couple of weeks and in those weeks she said he had said some stuff to her that seemed like he was subtly flirting. i didn’t mind because i knew that she didn’t like him, then she mentioned he knew we were possibly poly and he wanted to talk to me. so me thinking that he just wanted to ask questions i gave him my number. we got to talking and he was a very cool guy.

we all decided we would talk and see where this goes and that we would meet up on sunday so i could meet him for the first time. i was hesitant because why would a 22 year old man be interested in a 17 year old but i tried to shake the feeling.

sunday roles around and i meet him and he’s very touchy, hugging me a lot, holding me hand, touching my thighs without asking etc. i was getting very nervous but i tried to be optimistic.

the day ends and i go home and he texts me that he had fun etc and we talk like normal again, he then out of no where tells me he loves me and my girlfriend and that he wants to be with us. please note at this time we had been talking over text for like 4 days and he had just met me in person that day. i freaked out and told him to back off a bit and then he sulked.

i hung out with him a couple more times with my girlfriend and yesterday we both decided that this was weird, he constantly talked about how me and my girlfriend were technically virgins and that he didn’t care we were 17 etc. i took the blame and said it was my idea to end things so she didn’t feel awkward seeing him everyday at their course but today he didn’t turn up and has been guilting us about ending this even though we told him not to rush and that there were no promises that this would go anywhere.

i just want someone to tell me that i’m not in the wrong for feeling like i was about to get groomed? things just felt weird.