I am given money from my job to go make change of it at the bank very often. There’s the front desk first and this guy who sits in the back/on the side? I’m extremely tired and don’t feel like explaining but he sits behind glass and I pass him as I leave. The first time I saw this man, I jumped and ran off. I thought I was hallucinating. I thought about it all day. I figured i was just seeing things.

The second time I went back I sought to see him again, I went to back up and see him again and I just looked at him. I literally couldn’t believe my eyes. I went over his whole face.

He’s taller, and he moves different. His face moves different when he talks, but he looks so much like my deceased ex boyfriend that I thought I had seen a ghost looking at me when I first saw him.

I did that a few times to really show myself “he just looks like him.” And stopped. But I made a wrong impression.

Now when I show up the girls at the front whisper and giggle and call him up, and I have realized today that they think I have an attraction to him, and he’ll come out and stand around and smile real big at me, and when he did that I just stared at him like “what the fuck”

Because just wtf. I literally do not know explain to you or your front desk girls that you look like a man I saw buried into the ground.

I really did look at every single one of these people like “wtf” long enough that it started to get awkward. It was too much for me to process, what was going on. And seeing him actively get up and walk further towards me and look at me.

I’d rather not have to look at you, because it hurts ALOT,

But I have to make change of this money.

I am just tired, and still grieving,

I may sound like an ass but I’m just hurting. It hurts to see this guy.

And these people don’t know, and they’ll never know. And I think that makes it hurt worse.