So, some context: I am a full time medical assistant and my boyfriend is a full time ER tech and we have a 6 month old son. I work in a Dr's office, Monday through Friday and my boyfriend works 4 12's a week. We are extremely tight on $. So much so, that I just applied to McDonald's (my former high school job that I know the in's and out's of) as my second job. I am hoping they will let me work 6pm-12am. I feel bad because I feel like I never really see my son. On the days that he is off, my boyfriend will be with him until I come home. I see my baby for maybe 3 hours until he goes to bed at 7:30. But now with this second job, I will only see him in the mornings before work, and only sometimes(some days he wakes up earlier than others). I am sure that on the weekends I'll see him after or before work and I will see him here and there in between shifts and jobs.

I guess I am just upset, because being a parent is so much harder than I thought. I mean my baby came unexpected, but he's my entire world. I would do anything for my son, and that includes working fast food as a second job to provide for him. I have been trying not to break down and cry at work but I can feel myself starting to fall apart. I know that this second job situation is only temporary but I am so sad that I have to work this hard to help provide for him. When I am at work I just miss him so much and I know that working this other job is going to crush me emotionally but I have no choice. I am clinging on to the advise my coworker gave me 'he's not going to remember the times that you weren't there when he's 5, 15, 25, etc.' but I think it may not be about him, it's more about me being selfish and just wanting to be near him all the time. I wanted to stay at home but I couldn't, it's just not affordable.

Please, if anyone has some kind words to help me, that would be amazing. I am in some serious need of support right now, which is why I turned to this group. I am literally tearing up as I write this. I feel embarrassed and just plain sad. I am so heartbroken to make this decision but I could just being dramatic.

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