Bullying

All my life I have been different! I've been different since I was a child Seriously and I am still different as an adult and it sucks I don't fit in! It's f*cking painful.

I don't know what to do I just want someone to find me interesting.

Everyone has there social peers and I don't know where is my group I'm like you know in the wilderness you hear about a lone wolf, lone Lion animal and I'm like what did I do to deserve this be a outcast misfit I am not a lone wolf I like talking to people spending time with people but I am shy and I get nervous but I make effort definitely not popular outgoing.

I am tired of people not liking me and being bullied, ostracized I don't know what about me is so different

History : I saw loner's at my high school it was mostly because they had low self confidence, low self esteem and they couldn't talk make friends they were looking down and there were people who were exceptionally different than everyone else around them thinking like artist and people couldn't get them understand there fashion, sense of humor, personality.

History

When I was a little girl I started kindergarten turned four and I wasn't ready the other children were five almost six years old and they were more mature I remember my first memories of school being bullied because I was new at everything I needed help how to open my milk, tie shoe laces, etc. it was hard having children laugh at you or know more than you first grade there was a girl who repeated the first grade and she knew everything and would tell everyone they were stupid for not knowing until the teacher let us know it was her second try at the class but it was almost a year dealing with someone who tried so hard to prove they know more than you maybe you're stupid and it was all these things with teachers who had bad attitude and rude school staff bully's, to moving to a different state and having to meet strangers and I went to high school and I didn't fit in there was a place for different people the athletic people, the music people, the people who liked fantasy or video games, the people who would do drugs ditch school, I would sit in the library because I had no one I'd dive into a book to get lost.

No one understood me I had few friends they were mostly outgoing people who needed someone to vent to and I listened offer advice but they aren't here for me if they were I'd be talking to them instead I'm reaching out on an app to complete stranger's it's a lonely place because I'd like to have a friendship someone who I can hang out with, call on the phone to vent to someone who cares.

I'm an adult now barely it seems because my heart still hurts when I get rejected by society sigh I don't know what to do with myself