I don’t understand the difference?

So if an 18 year old is intimately tickling your 3 your old son, chasing him around when your son is trying to run away from him.. the 18 year old is constantly trying to pick your son up and give him hugs and guilt tripping him if he doesn’t give you a hug. Recording him constantly on his phone wouldn’t be appropriate….

Why would it be appropriate or okay to do so if the 18 year old has Asperger’s?

My 3 year old has told the boy no and to stop and so have I and my husband to leave him alone and he won’t.

But because me his mother knows this is going on and we’re all uncomfortable with what’s happening and ask the (sorry if sounds confusing) father in law’s girlfriend’s grandson to not come around us or our son in social events, there’s something mentally wrong with me????