Husband isn't ready...?

Question

Hey ladies! and gents, because I know there are few on here. First time poster here.

I am hoping for some opinions or experience stories...?

Anywho, here it is. I am 22 years old and my husband is 24. We have been together 4.5 years and married 1.5. When we first got married, and before, we had the idea of spending time just the two of us before adding any little ones into the picture. Mind you I've had baby fever since we started dating. Now it's worse than ever! I want a baby so bad and to start a family. My husband says he isn't ready yet and is just "waiting for it to click". He says if it happened now or on "accident" he would still be happy and excited, but a little more stressed because he isn't ready. He says if it happens it happens and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm trying so hard to convince him to start TTC but he just won't budge. I don't want to force him or make him feel pressured in anyway and I constantly remind him of that, but I just want a baby so bad!! So I guess what I'm looking for it of this post is...

Ladies, and gents, how long did it take for you/your SO to come around and decide they were ready to TTC? How were they? When did it "click" for them?

My husband did agree to start trying at the end of this year 2016, but I fear that he might change his mind of it still hasn't "clicked". I would never leave him for this reason or go to someone else. I'm just dying to have a baby and find myself more depressed than usual when AF arrives each month. I am not taking birth control because it just does not cooperate with my body. We are only using condoms and I'm very healthy gynocologically. So I know it wouldn't be difficult for us to TTC.

HELP I just need some advice to know what other people have been through. Thank you!

Answer

I will say if he is saying he's not ready then go with that. I was with my ex husband for 6 years before we got married got married at 22 and I was more then ready like you! I originally agreed to wait a year to start ttc then I talked him into 6 months then 3 saying that you never know how long it could take. I ended up pregnant 4 months after our wedding on the first try. We are now divorced bc after our son was born he could not deal with it, he wasn't ready and he told me that and I didn't listen and it ruined our marriage. He didn't want to be a dad yet we were still young and he wanted to still hang with his boys and play poker and be on his bowling league and have a day only dedicated to video games he wanted nothing to do with being a family, in my sons first year of life I think we fought more then we did in our entire relationship. We are both re married and he has another son and he is really good with him does all the things a dad should be doing. I chalk it up to age and maturity. Anyway that's my advice. Not saying this is everybody's story, it's mine but he's being honest with you and that's a really good thing!

Answer

It is ok not to be ready but he should stop thinking there will be a magic click that will make him ready. Even people who want babies right now feel unprepared when it happens. You will never be ready enough but give him some time to be more open

Answer

We have been together for a little over a year and it's taken mine till a month ago to start trying with me. It was a shock when he asked me cause I never thought he's budge and say it's a go lol.

Answer

Well my husband was ready right away so I don't need to convince him. It was up to me really but if he's not ready respect his decision. Having a baby takes allot of responsibly and sacrifice and it becomes hard when one or both parents aren't ready for those sacrifices. If he's not readydon't push it. The biological clock isn't ticking. Lol. There is still plenty of time

Answer

My husband and I were together for 12 years (only married for 3 years) before we decided to try (at age 30). Some people just take longer. I'm glad we waited. I liked it just being "us" first.

Answer

You are still young, you have plenty of time..  Took my husband 3 years of marriage, 5 years in total, and we are older, everyone is different.

Answer

My hubs finally felt ready at 32 (now). We had been talking ab it for many months before he finally felt on board. Last month was our first mo ttc so we will see what happens! Good luck and try to be patient with him. You've got lots and lots of time! And it'll happen when the timing is right for both of you.

Answer

My DH and I just started TTC this month I've been wanting to TTC ever since we got married in April of 2013. As much as I wanted a baby and as much as it hurt that he wasn't ready, I would rather him be ready than make him start TTC when he wasn't.

Answer

I'm in the same boat. My husband and I have been together for 10 years. (Married since 10/14). I'm ready but he's not. The waiting game sucks and hurts at the same time. But in the end I know it will be worth it.

Answer

My husband and I waited a little over 2 years of marriage to start trying. But we dated for 5 years before that so we had had a lot of us time! The only reason we waited a few more years after our wedding was because we waited until marriage to have sex and we wanted a few years to enjoy that together before we had little ones running around! 😁

Husband isn't ready...?

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