Opinions?

So today I was talking to my sons dad and he finally let me in on a secret he’s been keeping. He apparently doesn’t want to be with me in a relationship but he’s scared to be without me. It’s not because of me. It’s because he doesn’t want to deal with the courts and pay child support. So he pretends most of the time to like me and hang out but it doesn’t always work because he will get mad over the smallest things. He wants to sit around, be on his phone and be left alone. So that’s nice to know why he still wants me to suck his dick. Smh. Which I’m not that’s fucked up. Anyways I have opportunity to be out of here but he tells me “this is my sons home” so he says the baby stays. HOWEVER WHY WOULD A MOTHER LEAVE HER CHILD? I mean we have lived here for 20 months so what if he has a fucking hold on me like he thinks? We ain’t married and I live in the US I mean, you would think i would have more freedom right? So since we have lived here he thinks im stuck here and IT GETS IN MY HEAD. I can’t stand this crap. Yeah I may have fucked him and been with him the past 3 years but people change. He’s not who he used to be. But please tell me he’s tripping and I don’t have to stay, someone :/

We’ll update I guess…

He only wants to play these games due to the fact he is unstable to have a schedule because he doesn’t have a schedule of his own. Sure we will go to court and make one up but it doesn’t mean anything. He has parents, a grandma whoever to watch the kiddo. It doesn’t have to be him. This is a power move for him. I’ve tried being nice letting him know it’s not going anywhere good but for him loosing me at his house is a burden for him. He doesn’t have anybody to clean up after him and the kiddo. He doesn’t have anyone to feed him, change his diaper, give him a bath all of it. It would mean he has to get up and be a parent for once in his life. That’s big. I’ve tried my absolute best to make this work with the guy but it’s like fighting a terminal illness, I’m not going to win. I will never win against anyone’s addictions. Whether it’s a game, drugs, alcohol, food it don’t matter. Oh yeah also he just leads me on thinking everything is okay, until it’s not then he says he acted that way to get what he wanted. I just don’t understand how a person could be so rude and disrespectful to me then expect me to be nice and if I’m not nice I’m just a bitch. There’s always a name for everything. Like I said, there’s no winning. Mind you, why would I want to win now at this point? I’m desperate for his attention and love but where is that getting me? Clearly nowhere so thanks again for clarifying I don’t want to be with him but he needs to understand he don’t want to be with me either. Not keep me around to save money lmao