I’m scared at 12 weeks pregnant

I’m 12 weeks 1 day pregnant and I’ve had two scans seen baby moving seen the heart beating at 8 weeks 6 days that was my last scan. Found out I’m having a boy through blood tests and I’m so in love with my son already. But around 10 weeks I woke up and felt better no sickness and my uterus didn’t feel full anymore I didn’t feel any pains that I had been feeling like slight cramping I’d been having that reassured me he was growing and moving about. All stopped, my boobs were still sore but not as sore as they had been and for two weeks they have been hurting on and off. I got a fetal Doppler and I can’t find baby’s heartbeat at all I’ve spent ages trying I’ve tried all the tricks and nothing and I have this overwhelming feeling in my soul that he’s gone. I can’t shake it. I keep crying. I’ve lost 13 babies previously. This is my 14th. Am I right in listening to my gut feeling?

I have a scan on the 18th to date baby.

I can’t sleep I can’t function I’m terrified.