How does he really feel about our marriage ? Seems no effort is being applied

I lost it on my husband last night because he is always working and we never do anything as a family anymore together. It’s always him staying later at family events and me leaving to take the kids home. I watch the kids while he runs his errands and it’s minimal time spent together. He has the kids while I work on saturdays. I told him he makes me feel alone. He does work two jobs and I work a full time job as well. He doesn’t go to bars like that but he’s always gotta go get something done. I ask him to bring the kids or something and it’s too much or he says it’ll be quick.

My family doesn’t live here and I don’t have many friends. He said he would do better and he apologized but I feel like this was my 5th time or so bringing it up. When I finally break down and cry and freak out, now he wants to listen and apologize. He kept asking me if I wanted to leave him. We finally ended it on an ok night but he was upset afterwards I didn’t show him much affection. And he just said he didn’t want a weird vibe between us… so I text him asking him why he wants to put in the effort and what makes me his soulmate after 8 years and this was the response. It honestly made me feel like he’s in it for comfort or because he knows he has me around to take care of the kids idk if my emotions are getting the best of me or what that I feel some way about this but I need some advice. He gets in moods where he wants affection but other times I feel like it’s just whatever. It’s hard to think the man who was once madly in love with me is like just whatever or burnt out now

Our text convo :

ME Why do you think/ feel I’m your soul mate or the one for you after these 8 years ? What makes you want to try harder or do better for me

HIM Because we still remain. I think we grow through what we go through even if we don’t see eye to eye. I’d like to say we grew up together because my mind was definitely not in the place that it is now. You take good care of my babies. Really just everything overall.

ME You mean we still remain like we’ve gone through things ? I just want you to still enjoy me the same and have the same butterflies for me, eyes and heart only for me. I don’t want comfort of time or the fact I take care of the kids trump that. I don’t want me taking care of the kids be a reason you want to be with me

HIM Way to shoot down what I said. I do get butterflies when things are going right. I also do enjoy you very much so, when we’re not going through this type of stuff. When we’re good we’re good when we’re not nothing seems enough. And if those are things you question am I really the one for you?

ME Not shooting down what you said I’m just asking questions or clarifying so I can understand your thoughts and feelings as well

HIM are you sure ?

ME yes

HIM when is this going to stop ?