I need some advice about my husband, who is 30, and me, 29. Over the years, it’s been challenging dealing with his lack of emotional regulation. He doesn't yell or take things out on me, but when he's upset, it affects his mood and rubs off on me. As a solution-oriented person, I try to help, but he shoots down my suggestions and keeps complaining. It’s frustrating because most of the time, he has control over the issues, like his job.

I want to be a safe space for him, but it feels like he enjoys being in a victim mentality instead of taking responsibility. He uses excuses like not being taught anything as a child, which I can empathize with, but he's 30 now! Even small inconveniences seem extreme to him. I want to have a child next year, but he’s unsure, and I’m worried his issues will be a problem when we have a child. I've asked him to go to therapy, but he won't. Any advice? P.s separation is NOT an option because I love him and this is not a deal breaker for me, just a concern.