Mostly need to vent and I think hearing from other women would help me process my thoughts…

I’m thinking of separating from my husband of 7 years. We have an 11 month old daughter who we tried for 5 years to conceive, our miracle baby…

I’ll try to keep this short - our marriage was great until after I got pregnant. It started with my husband just not wanting to have sex anymore, he said it was weird with me pregnant and we had sex only 2x at the beginning of the pregnancy and that was that. I didn’t dwell on it, as I got further along I was more and more uncomfortable and so even though I wanted to, I let it go.

Fast forward to baby being born, and now 11 months later, we’ve only had sex 3 times this last year. I’ve tried to talk to him about it multiple times and he just says he isn’t as interested as he used to be but loves me.

On top of that the parenting duties have become very one sided. We both work, but I work from home and can have our daughter with me (which I love) but when he gets home he is very little to no hands on. He’s sweet to her, gets excited to see her but most of the time I can’t even go shower without having to bring her with me because he wants his free time. Sometimes I argue and he will tell me it’s fine and watch her so I can shower but most of the time he tells me I should take her up with me so I just do at this point to avoid the argument. He goes days and sometimes up to a week without changing a diaper. He doesnt do meal times with her, even on weekends, never bathed her, hasn’t spent one night up with her since she was about 2 months old, and even before then I was up with him and he was just mostly helping support me (which I appreciated very much).

Now he is a sweet man, funny, outgoing and will do things if I get upset… but I’m so tired of having to get upset first): I’m so tired of having conversations with him about it and nothing changing. I also told him from the very beginning I want at least two kids, he was all for it and now that he realizes the work that goes into having a baby he doesn’t want another one, and that’s hard for me honestly. Especially since I do 90% of everything anyways, so I guess I don’t understand why it’s so hard for him to the the point he changed his mind):

A good example is today… he worked from 630am to 4pm. Comes home, eats dinner, says hi to baby girl but doesn’t hold her. Goes to gym at 6, home at 8, uses bathroom for an hour then showers until 930…. Baby goes to sleep at 830 and I lay with her because she’s always struggled to sleep alone… but tonight I rocked her for an hour and a half. I texted him when he got out of the shower and asked if he could help and he said “let me know if you still need me in 20 mins” then went and hopped on his video games….

I didn’t even bother to ask for help again.

I’m just tired yall): idk… me and him have talked about all this so many times im just to the point im contemplating alternative choices now. I never thought id even consider it. I love this man, but i cant see the rest of our time raising our baby being this way and im so sad about his decision to only want one now.