In my 30s dealing with parents divorcing.

How do you deal with such a big change in your daily life? My dad admitted to cheating on my mom. And Mom is going thru with Divorce. Im stressing out as my husband is A LOT like my dad. We are uprooting our family and moving down south to be with my moms family, they are the only family who can support my mom.. And I am not leaving my mom. She is the rock in my family. How do you not choose sides when your father broke the most important promise and vow to his family? To your mother? He destroyed the future i thought my family had in this state. And im now having to plan a 20 hour drive across the country with my broken family.. My mind is going everywhere. I have a 3 year old and a 2 year old. How do i explain to them that they will not see their papa anymore? How do i explain moving from the only place ive ever known as home to a state i only spent summers in growing up? How do i not compair my parents relationship to mine, in fear of my husband leaving me? Leaving me to do exactly what my moms having to do.. Im so lost, so hurt and confused. I used to be one of the only kids in my class to brag that i had parents that were still together and still in love.. Now I dont even know if that's true. Did dad stay with mom just because of us kids? Is this our fault? My dad is blaming the sudden change on my just turned 30 sister who still lives with them.. How do i help her cope with misguided blame? How do people do this? Sorry.. I dont have my thoughts together as this JUST got sprung on us all yesterday.. I dont even know if any of this makes sense.. I just need to know how to manage?