So I’m in a bit of a situation here. Back in the beginning of Feb of this year my fiancé( 23 M )and I (25 F) moved to another state with the rest of my bio family; during this time I was pregnant. The move was really fast and I felt like my family wasn’t prepared. I told my mother that we would try it for a year and if we didn’t like it we would do something else. Well this last year has been hell. I let me parents talk me into wanting to move with them because they needed my name in the house and I thought it would be better for my baby in the long run. Long story short things were said to me about not unpacking there things fast enough or didn’t organize anything. ( we did; there’s 14 of us and he was my fiancé and I left to unload it until they could bring the rest of our stuff). I milked my pregnancy and didn’t do anything.

We gave up all our shaving to get everyone over here. My parents maxed out my credit card. They put my name on the tractor here they got. It all came to a head during my birth. My fiancé got into it with my family because he thought I wanted everyone to be quiet so he was trying to insure that. Plus we did a home birth so he was. Stressed out because we were an hour away from a hospital that has a pediatrician unit. He snapped at my family for things. This cause a whole storm. During my birth my dad said something and left “made a sense”. Two of my brothers left to the bar because they were going to fight him supposedly. The younger three went upstairs. My mom sat on the stairs until our son came out. I was moved into my bedroom to get stitches. My fiancé left to go upstairs; and didn’t come back for awhile. I guess my dad was yelling at him and threatening to kick his ass. I didn’t know at the time and was asking for my mom and no one could find her. My grandma came in and held my hand. My mom came in at the end looked at my son said something to me and left. I didn’t see them until the next day when I woke up in the afternoon. I went upstairs with my son to see them and I got ambushed about the birth and how I shouldn’t marry him. That he was controlling. I was hormonal and wasn’t thinking straight so I came down here and got into an argument with him about it. The next two days I got sick I ended up going septic and had to stay in the hospital for a week. I told my fiancé something was wrong and I ask my mom to come down cause I was scared. She tried not to come down here at all because of my fiancé. I felt like I had to beg her to come check on me. There things were awkward but I thought they were on the mend. My fiancé apologize and was doing a lot to mend their relationship between them. I have had hard feeling about my birth because I felt abandoned by them and that they put there emotions in front of the my sons birth. We’ll finally I blew up on my parents the other day. We came home from visiting my fiancé sister. My dad was trying to put his cold hands on me and I told him to stop like 3 times. The 4th time he went to do it I snapped a bit and shoved his hands away. My dad then mumbled something under his breath and left. He came out 10 mins later and I was sitting at the table when he told me that I didn’t want to start anything with him cause I wouldn’t like it. That’s when I went off about what his problem is. Apparently I didn’t specifically tell him we were going to his sisters. I don’t know how he didn’t know I told every for a month even my aunt who was here for a week and a half new I was going. I told him that. He told me he didn’t know anything and that it was my fault. That I act different now that my fiancé was home full time. (I spend more time with them but I don’t see how else, there are the family I am making so I think that’s fine) my father then said he was going to kick my fiancé butt. Every time I say something he or one of my brothers doesn’t like they first thing is to threaten to fight him. I told them how I felt abandoned at the end of my birth. This sent my dad into a furry he told me that I was spoiled ungrateful brat because I said I felt that way. That I needed them for money, I wouldn’t if they would stop talking everything. Ffs my mom has taken over my bank account cause hers got hacked. My dad told me “f*** you” and that I could never take that back. My brother told me that I deserved the rude things they said to me during my pregnancy. When I didn’t reach the way he wanted he would get CM away from my nose and try to stare me down. When that didn’t work he resorted to trying to say things to hurt my feelings. Like I abandoned them during my birth and it was all my fault.

I want to leave and head back to the area we are from. I can’t feel safe here with this whole situation. The thing is I know it will start another fight. My bio Fam is notorious for cutting people off if they don’t like what you did. We wanted to leave and not tell anyone but I feel like I can do that to my mom, grandma, and little brothers. I still want them in my life and my sons but I can’t live here anymore I’m not happy and I don’t feel safe.

I guess I’m asking if I am thinking clearly? I should tell my mom and them and just not say anything to the rest or if I tell my mom and leave a note? I want them in my life so bad.