I want out so badly

I literally can’t stand my boyfriend anymore. We’ve known each other since middle school and have always been off and on. I got pregnant at 19 and we broke up before the baby was born. Got back together when my daughter was 18 months old and he’s cheated once since then that I’ve known about. I remember spending so many of my nights in school and throughout the last few years since having my daughter, crying or being disappointed in this man and the life and love he’s given me. Other than the cheating, he’s not the absolute worst but I know there’s a better love for me somewhere. This man is pretty bad though, he doesn’t even help much with our children, or has to be told to help, he’s constantly embarrassing me in public and in front of friends/family. He’s selfish and overspends so we go without a lot, he also thinks of his needs only unless reminded 100 times. I don’t even like laying in the same bed with him at night, and I’ve grown distant as far as touch and communication. There’s no way to fix it because I want to enjoy the rest of my 20s free of him. He’s also a huge mamas boy and has talked shit about me with her in the past. I also think he might be gay. 🤷‍♀️ I sound like a fucking clown typing this out, I know I look like a clown to the people around me. I just have no money or a way out right now. I’m hoping with my tax check in the next couple months I can take my kid and go but I’m not happy with him and I know I’m not the best mom I can be when I constantly having to parent him on top of my kid. I know I will be happier and my kids will be too if we were separated. I wa