Will a drinking problem ever go away 😔

Girls I really need some advice.

I’ve been in a relationship for 2 and a half years with this man and I love him but he’s got an alcohol problem.

He always has done from the beginning although it wasn’t too obvious at first….

We had our first issue during him being drunk and he showed a whole different side to him.

Now the man I know normally is kind and caring and promises me all he wants is our little family but there’s been many times where he’s shown the opposite. He has had issues with my children in the past and us never getting “time” together and so on and I have doubted that he’s capable of life with kids “He has 2 adult children”

Now 98% of the time our relationship is good. We’re making plans, we’re happy and content but sometimes he will drink too much and he completely switches. He’s awful to me, makes me feel completely useless, tells me I’m terrible, only a matter of days ago he got in a bad mood because of my youngest playing up and later on in the night started a issue with me for no reason other than him being in a bad mood. I was in bed, he goes downstairs and I can hear him playing what I can only refer to as music you would listen to after a bloody break up and I went downstairs and turned it off and said sort your S**t out basically! It proceeded with him being an absolute idiot and calling me all sorts to the point I told him to get out as he just doesn’t stop.

We spoke the next day and I said I’ve had enough and it makes me want to throw the towel in, I told him he has to bloody stop and of course he tells me he knows he has been drinking too much and promises he won’t blah blah blah well

We went to my family’s yesterday and he put 2 beers in my handbag to take after already having 2 prior and I said no, he proceeded to take one and it turns out when we were there he disappeared to the shop with my brother in law and downed 3 cans outside the shop and told him not to tell me as I would “kick off” he bought 4 more and bought them into my family and drank them all.

Now of course my sister told me and said it was as if he was down there slagging me off behind my back for things saying that he’s got to find £600 a month for the next 3 months for our bloody holiday that IVE booked. “The holiday was his idea” he was gonna pay the holiday and I would cover spending money and he was down there moaning about me to him and told him not to tell me anything about the drinking down the shop and so on.

I was sat at my family yesterday looking like a right fool bigging him up, saying he’s only had 1 beer today and sounding like a right idiot when all along my sister and brother in law knew It was a lie so she got really pissed off and had to tell me. I can’t help but feel like I’m going to waste so many of my years with him and I’m gonna end up regretting it as in my heart I don’t think it’s gonna change. We rarely go out anywhere of the party style but there’s been a couple of times when we have and he’s always too “hands on” with females…including my friends and family when he’s had a drink.

People say I’ve completely changed, apparently I act differently around him, I’m not the same and I constantly seem on edge.

I’m so stuck.

How can I make the decision to throw our whole life away when the majority of the time it’s okay, I feel like I’ll never find anyone as good as him . Maybe that’s my own issues because I’ve had such bad men in the past so to me he seems like a saint.

My family are so worried I’m gonna spend 5 years in this situation and then look back and regret what I’ve done and deep down so am I. 😔

I know there might not even be any advice to give but I just needed to write this!