Need help and hope in my marriage
So me and my husband have been together for 7 years and we been married 6.5 months. I've posted about us before. When we first met for him it was love at first sight but for me not so much. It took me about 1 and a half before I said I love you. I honestly feel like we are soul mates, bc we have broke up before but we some how always end up back together. He is the love of my life. And well 3 months after we got married he went to work one day and never came home. I was sick to my stomach I thought he was hurt I didn't hear from him for about 2 weeks. And he told me he just couldn't do it anymore and that he needed space. I went through a big depression and I lost 25 pounds in a matter of 2 weeks I went from a size 9 to a size3 I didn't even know it was possible. But back to the story so I gave him his space and he got his own apartment. No sooner then that I found out he was talking to other girls and meeting up other girls. I confronted him and he said it was nothing and that he didn't want to be with anyone and just wanted to be alone. I tried being there for him but the more I tried the more I pushed him away. Then I came to find out he was talking with this girl who was pregnant by some other man, the girl was much younger then the both of us. So he ended up sleeping with her and not just once multiple times. He says it's not cheating bc we weren't together but we are still married so I still think it's cheating. Am I wrong? Fast forward this went on for a few weeks maybe a month. So then I felt absolutely betrayed by him. I had made this man my whole life and I accepted him for all that he was and all that he wasn't. I felt like my world was crumbling down. But karma took care of him bc he lost his job, and wrecked both of our cars and lost his apartment. Right then and there I knew I couldn't let him drag me through that so I did it upon myself to let him go and move on. Although it took everything in me, I didn't want my marriage to be a statistic and just be a joke. I had cut off all ties linked to him. I still remained his friend but from a distance. We slowly gradually started to fix our relationship. So here we are back together again. We are a work in progress. But it's tough. I get you cant live in the past bc then you'll never move forward, but I just can't let go, I was a fool and and joke to him. I don't know how to move forward from this.
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